Maureen is…Funking December 31, 2006
Posted by Marybeth in acceptance, charity, family, forgiveness, l(i)(o)ve, l(o)(i)ve, love, separateness, unconditional.trackback
Sunday, December 31, 2006 1:26 PM
Mood: In a funk.
Hmm, I just wrote that my mood this afternoon is ‘funking’.
In other words, I am in between, unsure of where and what I should be doing. Am I happy and optimistic or sad and pessimistic – half full or half empty?
Perhaps I am asking the wrong question?
Maybe I shouldn’t be asking the question at all and just be in the ‘now’ – happy with what is and not think too far forward or too far back. Aim to live my life in five minute pieces – two and a half minutes ago, now, and two and a half minutes from now.
When is the best time to plant a tree? Twenty years ago. When is the second best time to plant a tree? Now.
I am actually not sure that I can live up to the five minute ideal right now. It is the day before the new year and it is right to take stock and plan for the coming year so I will.
To be continued….
Sunday, December 31, 2006 4:50 PM
Well, it is a little later and a little bit cooler too. The first time I was out here writing it was around -2 celsius but now I believe it is around -5 degrees. Which is actually not a bad thing at all as they were forecasting freezing rain tonight and, while they may get some in the valley I have a really hard time believing that we will get the same here. Maybe the humidity went up and that is why it feels cooler?
I looked a some pictures from my military and grad school days with my neices and my partner. One striking thing is that there weren’t a lot of people in the pictures. Many landscapes and scenery shots. It seems I was more comfortable focusing on where I was and what I was doing – not on who I was with and the people I knew. I am quite sad about the last part because I knew some really cool people and it would have been nice to have pictures of them to help me remember what they looked like…
Family – you can’t live with them and you can’t shoot them.
We tolerate each other because we are related. We accommodate each other’s idiosyncracies because we care enough to be patient. We care enough to allow ourselves to be inconvenienced by their needs and neglect our own at times so they are happy. We believe that in return they may compromise on their happiness too so that we can be happy. It doesn’t seem to work that way in the ‘real’ world. But it could and perhaps, should.
A smile is thank you enough.
The act is fulfillment in itself.
We aren’t charitable because it meets our own needs, we are charitable because it is right to be charitable. With enough practice it becomes automatic and we can act without expectation of reciprocation and truly love the world unconditionally.
Someone once said that if only we were as forgiving of others as we are of ourselves we would live much more peacefully together.
…Well it turns out I was wrong, I think I managed to really live in the now and focus on what really matters – how we love each other now. Not how much I failed to love yesterday or how much I plan to love tomorrow. I. Will. Love. Now.
Maybe tomorrow (January 1st!) is the right time to be reflective and resolutionary. Today, let’s leave the old year with hope in a new year full of love. Now.
Happy New Year with (unconditional) love,
Maureen
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